Deep Lyrics – Wolf Hurricane

Wolf Hurricane is the definitive Yamucha insert song. In fact, it’s the only Yamucha insert song. And it was only used once. When he lost a fight. Hey, definitive doesn’t mean good. You can listen to it below this sentence right here.

Julian Grybowski, he of Daizenshuu EX, once translated the lyrics of this wonderful song to English. Of course Japanese is a very temperamental language where nothing is what it seems, innocent sounding phrases have deeper meaning and basically, are inscrutable to even the most logical of men. Like women. With the talking and the shoe shopping and hot flashes. Dames!

So I’m going to take a look at, and revise when necessary, Julian’s (we’re on a first name basis as of… now. He just doesn’t know yet) work. That way, I don’t have to do much, making this my favourite type of post besides the non-existent ones I made for the last few months. Issues I have with the translation will be highlighted in some colour or another and expanded upon below.

That's right, losing to Triclops in the first round got Yamucha an insert song. He didn't even get one when the Saibaiman blew up. Ronri urufu! Parts of you are over there!

With cool looks and a hot heart,
I am the rumored nice guy, (Yamcha!)
Incredibly strong, but clueless when it comes to women,
I have dreams where even the flowers blush!

There are a few issues here with this first set of lyrics. “Hot heart” is obviously a terrible translation of “heart burn” for one. Really, the meaning of that line is more that while Yamucha’s teeth are chattering due to having to experience the cold desert nights, his heart is aflame because, shit, all those instant noodles he eats aren’t good for you.

I don’t know what “rumored nice guy” means. Is it anything like “rumoured nice guy”? Score one for European snobbery! Face, America! Okay, but yeah, who’s spreading rumours that Yamucha is a nice guy? The next part reveals all: Yamucha, that’s who. He uses multiple sock puppet accounts to support his own opinions, just like I do on Daizex with all my female alt accounts. Yes, I am EVERY female account on Daizex. I am a sad, lonely man. I also do voice work under the name “Chris Sabat.” The balls are inert you guys! See? See?

Anyway, “Incredibly strong” is a lie. Just check the Manga Review for that. Clueless when it comes to women is pretty good though. Let’s face it, this is how Yamucha “operates.”

1. Staggers into bed and pulls at your pants
2. Quickly pulls down his pants
3. Finishes
4. Asks if it was good for you
5. Leaves

Note: Points 3,4 and 5 are near simultaneous.

Note 2: I really hope this wasn’t your first sex ed class otherwise your parents are going to be pissed at me.

“I have dreams where even the flowers blush” is just insane Japanese lyrical bullshit. THE FLOWERS BLUSH WHILE YOUR HEAD IS EMPTY AS YOU GOTTA POWAA ON A BALL!! It also implies Yamucha has a scat fetish wherein he shits on flowers to fertilize them. You may think that’s gross but at least he’s helping the environment.

A blushing flower, yesterday. Not pictured: poop.

Second Verse

Intoxicated by a bouquet of love,
You’ve always been the one I’ve set my gaze on!
Don’t turn away, stay here,
Because I get weak in front of your eyes!

The first line makes sense if you’ve seen Batman & Robin. “You can’t send me to dah coolah!” “What killed da dinosaws? Da ice age!” Anyway, in that Poison Ivy uses magic flower stuff to make Batman and Robin horny for her. I think this is the same thing but I’m not a Japanese expert. I still marked it as it’s a pretty obscure reference seeing as only 8 people saw Batman & Robin.

The next three lines fantastically capture the manipulation Yamucha, and by extention every man ever, goes through in order to get laid. “Oh, I’m so shy and coy, hee hee. I always liked you and you make me feel so happy… so turn around! Stay there! Ass up! Rotate 34 degrees clockwise! I said clockwise! Who’s your daddy?! Was it good for you I’ll call you k thanks bai”

Chorus

Lonely Wolf! Yamcha of the Desert!
When the light of the stars hits my heart,
Lonely Wolf! Even though the wind howls,
My footprints will remain!

The first line is pretty transparent: Yamucha is a chronic masturbator. “When the light of the stars hits my heart” is probably something to do with open heart surgery, probably due to the earlier mentioned heartburn. Just remember, champ, just because Pu’reh can transform into a surgeon doesn’t mean he has any skills in that department.

“Even though the wind howls, my footprints will remain” is just scientifically bunk. The flow of gases on a large scale will obviously destabilise the foot-shaped indentation you put into sand. It’s just science, scientifically speaking. You’d have to be on the moon or walking in quick-dry cement for your footprints to remain. Now, it might be a reference to Yamucha hoping to be on the Hollywood Walk of Fame some day but, really, the git has no hope in hell of that ever happening. Scientifically speaking.

Don't spray around Pu'reh's mouth, Ema. You'll be grossed out by what you find, scientifically speaking.

Stanza the Third

Battling with guts, without showing tears,
I’m always a nice guy, (Yamcha!)
With an engines-full-throttle turbo feeling,
I run full-speed towards tomorrow!

“Battling with guts” should, obviously, be sumo wrestling. Obviously Julian has NEVER been to Japan or he would know this, geez. “Without showing tears” is something a crybaby would say. Real people who don’t cry don’t run around bragging about it. Besides, as Sesame Street taught us, it’s all right to cry sometimes. Yamucha obviously has crippling emotional problems.

This is further proved by the line “I’m always a nice guy” which in the original draft was followed up by “so why does my crush always date bad boys? I’m nice, damn it! So why can’t she get it through her thick head that she should be with me?! Maybe if I wallflower enough she’ll understand I’m her true love!”

When she sees you'll do anything she says, she's bound to respect you

The rest of the verse is gibberish because, it’s quite clear to me, Julian just ran the Japanese lyrics through Babelfish. Yes, Julian Grybowski does not, in fact, know any Japanese! I expect this revelation to be silenced by those “in power” but for now, there’s the truth.

4th Verse

I want to make a promise of love,
But tying a ribbon makes me too weak all at once!
Don’t come any closer, stay there,
Because I love everything about you!

I’m just going to say this (because this is getting to be more work than I thought). If Yamucha can’t tie a ribbon (around the old oak tree, I presume) to signify affection, just want until Bulma expects a proposal. Oh right, that never happened. I wonder why.

The second two lines as translated are, I admit, a decent literal rendition but within the context of the character, the following would communicate the meaning better; “I’m leaving you. It’s not you, it’s me. You’re a super girl though.” He will then block your phone number forever.

Verse 5 That’s Almost Like the Chorus

Lonely Wolf! Yamcha of the Wild!
As soon as the Southern Cross shines down,
Lonely Wolf! Towards the sky,
My world will be burning for you!

I think the first line means Yamucha pees in bushes. I can see why Julian wanted to obscure that. However, I am on a search for truth and must leave no yellow stained stone unturned.

The last three lines are just about understandable. It seems to be saying that when the Southern Cross, a constellation made of five main stars, shines down, the world will burn in a sea of flames and agony. As the Southern Cross is the smallest of the 88 modern constellations, I would agree that for it to be bright enough to literally shine down on us, it would need the destructive solar power output that could doom us all.

I’m not really sure what that tells us, but I guess it makes for a powerful moment in the song. “I’m shy around girls and now our faces will all mellllllt (Yam-u-cha!)”

After that, we get another rendition of the chorus as we fade out.

Cat loves Super Nova! Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Conclusions

After all that, there are some general conclusions we can draw about the song “Wolf Hurricane.” The main one is that it’s misogynistically gibberish. Most of the song has to be with Yamucha’s wang and his bizarre fetishes and no, this isn’t me projecting, not even, shut up.

Second, we see how a more tightened translation (by me) can change the meaning of the song from the more censorious version by Julian. I appreciate why he tried to make the song lyrics more neutral and PG, but I am anti-censorship.

Third, I don’t think I can go back to Daizenshuu EX for a while. Every single user referenced in the article will now hate me for being even tenuously connected to this article. I wrote it and even I don’t know what the hell is going on. Sorry, everyone!